thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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