I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
Dear sober self: your car keys are in the glove compartment, your car is outside the church. I hope you're reading this from your own bed instead of someone else's.
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
Randomize
