i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
Randomize
