And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
I need to align my fucking chakras
Randomize