So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
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