Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
According to Joseph, last night I crawled into bed and told him to pretend I'm his French maid, and then started speaking with a German accent, and referring to his manbits as "ze greatest Weiner schnitzel I'd ever seen". Basically, last night was a roaring success.
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