I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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