I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
Oh, btw, UPS might come by. Drunk me ordered us $75 worth of gummy airhead starburst type candies. Whatever it is, it'll be delicious.
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
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