Is it normal to miss your booty call?
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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