Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
Randomize
