I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Randomize
