You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
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