She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
The sad part is I didn't even want to get laid. I just wanted the emotional connection, but my vagina was screaming "TOUCH ME. TOUCH ME RIGHT NOW BECAUSE MY DADDY ISSUES ARE MUCH DEEPER THAN MY EMOTIONAL NEEDS!" Vodka has a way of getting me out of my emotions and gets me fucked every time.
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
Randomize