Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
Randomize
