You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
