I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
I currently don't understand fingers.
Randomize
