He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
Let's be real. I'm the Usain Bolt of running away after hookups. Fastest (wo)man alive.
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
All the doctor said was why
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
Randomize
