let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
Randomize
