More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
Dude. I just woke up without a shirt or bra on. Apparently I fell asleep with a quesadilla in my mouth. I can feel my liver hating me.
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
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