I scissor kicked a one legged man last night.
He was trying to put me in handcuffs.
You have my attention.
The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
Randomize
