so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
I have fence marks all over my body
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
Randomize
