i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Text me right after you finish, I want to know how the ghetto fleshlight worked out
How about I just call you while I'm doing it so you can hear my reaction?
I woke up to 'call me' written in red lipstick on my chest. Thats the hottest/sluttiest thing ever. I win at LIFE!
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
Randomize
