He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
