wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
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