I can text with my tongue
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
Randomize
