What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
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