i jhust puked up my retainher.
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
Just paid my credit card bill at the bar. This phone makes it so I never have to leave
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Randomize
