Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
Randomize
