yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
where are my eyebrows?
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