we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
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