Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
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