Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
