he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
wow bdsm is so cute
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