Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
I had to cum in my sink.
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
Randomize