It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
I managed to convince my mom that my hickey was a birth mark I have always had. She cried for an hour about being a terrible mother for never noticing it.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Randomize
