why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
Randomize
