I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize