Where did you get a picture of my penis
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
Randomize
