he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
I think we might need a safe word for this...
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Randomize
