At least make sure they are 18
Why
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize