so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
Do you still have your period?
I wish I only lived at night.
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
Don't make this awkward for me. Don't let your mom come near the bathroom. I can't meet your mom for the first time while I'm shitting. Dont make this awkward.
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
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