It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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