that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
Randomize
