new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
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