she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
Randomize
