I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
Randomize
