Just fell off a train. Bad.
He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
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