I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
Randomize
