I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
Randomize
