Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
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