How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
Randomize
