I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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